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All the Perl that's Practical to Extract and Report

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  • Corporate. Policy.
    • LOL, just this past week I had a quick conversation with 'The Helpdesk Gestapo' when they came upstairs to install a new software package on my laptop:

      helpdesk guy: Oh, so you don't use Outlook for mail then?
      me: Er, no, I prefer Mozilla thanks.
      helpdesk guy: Well you do know that Outlook is the corporate standard and we don't support any other software.
      me: Yes I'm well aware of the corporate standards with regards to Microsoft software.
      helpdesk guy: Well, you really need to use Outlook going forward.
      • At some point last year we were given a fancy four-color booklet titled "[CompanyNameWithheld] Antivirus Quick Guide". I pinned it to my cube front wall and used a black marker to make it even quicker: "Step 1: Don't Use Microsoft Products."
    • Corporate. Policy.

      Well, OK, that just changes the question a little - why does anyone work for a corporate? :)

    • Corporate Policy in my place is termination
      of employment on use of Outlook. PCs are
      trawled every night for rogue installs. All
      31.000 of them :-)