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All the Perl that's Practical to Extract and Report

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  • The better DBA's I've worked with have been able to extract a healthy pile of clues from the admin tools provided with SQL Server (e.g., who has what locked).

    Since you're dealing with a single row in a single table, my number one cause of mystery grief on SQL Server--row locks getting escalated to page locks--probably isn't an issue.

    • dws wrote: The better DBA's I've worked with have been...

      Ovid replied: ha, ha, ha, grunt, snort, ha!

      We let our "DBA" go on the grounds that we couldn't afford him. That's true because while he might have been qualified to be an intern, he certainly wasn't qualified to be a senior DBA. He lied his @$$ off on his resume and when he was hired, no one was capable of evaluating his performance -- not surprising given that this company once hired a CTO who didn't know what FTP was. Then I returned to the company after a leave of absense and the man who became my boss was hired. We were astonished at how little our "DBA" knew. He didn't appear to know SQL very well, did not understand the rules of database normalization and we were forced to redesign everything he came up with. I can't tell you how frustrating it was trying to explain to our "DBA" that a user name is a rotten primary key (one of his rebuttals: "If you need to change it, you can just write a script to change all of the instances of it!" :-). This idiot was also, to the best of my knowledge, the highest paid employee in the company. Some how, some way, I need to develop the chutzpah to pull off a stunt like that.

      I wish we had a DBA here, but we've been forced to struggle along without one. Of course, I also wish we had a QA department. I wish we had more permanent funding. I wish, I wish, I wish.

      On the other hand, there is kind of a pleasant surrealness working for a high-tech company that heats its office with a wood stove.

      • "If you need to change it, you can just write a script to change all of the instances of it!"

        Hmmm...

        Actually, you could remove a layer of indirection by eliminating the username entirely. That way, if it changes, you don't have to update anything at all. You'll still be able to refer to users by other unique fields. The probability that any two users have the same hire date and birth date is probably sufficiently low ...and if not, you can just throw in more fields until you eliminate the duplication.

        The