The recent arrest of Senator Craig has undoubtedly provided a significant boost to your efforts to host future political conventions. I have no doubt you're updating your convention prospectus material as I write this. The rallying cry of "Never fear: no queers here!" will undoubtedly warm the hearts of convention delegates of both parties.
However, if I may, I'd like to offer a few suggestions to avoid potential future unsavory episodes:
I hope my suggestions do not fall on deaf ears, In this moment of glory, full of a sense of pride and self-congratulation, you and your constabulatory may look askance at the "low hanging fruit" available to control the more salacious nenbers of your community.
Tab, Your pacifist Working Boy