I feel... dirty saying it, but I've actually kept two spams from recent weeks. One is shocking in its audaciousness, the other is just bizarre.
The first came a few weeks ago about a "GUARANTEED WAY TO QUICKLY HAVE EXCELLENT CREDIT!!". Apparently the only way to do this is to create a ficticious identity, which these folks will do for you for $29.95. But before you scoff, just wait. They'll also assist you in adding unlimited positive information to your credit report!
The second came today and has a subject line: "Time Travelers PLEASE HELP!!!!" It goes on to ask for help if you "are a time traveler or alien disguised as human and or have the technology to travel physically through time." Fortunately the author isn't a cheapskate: "If you can help me I will pay for your teleport or trip down here, Along with hotel stay, food and all expenses." Nice!