Sometimes I feel like my butt will become Germany, circa 1938. Hitler's at the helm and he's making plans for expansion. It would start out innocently enough, a few troops in the Rhineland, the jeans getting a bit snug. But next thing he's annexing Austria, invading Poland, seams are bursting and chairs are breaking. Suddenly there's the map of Europe with swastikas peppered all over the place and I have nothing to wear but a mumu.
Also see Masturbation Schedule. Snicker.
Notice the way Americanisms encroach upon Australian English: "butt" is not standard Down Under slang. This is why the People's Linguistic Front of Australia (Rule One: No Poofters!) recently burnt George Bush in elegy.