As a fellow Brit perl hacker living in the States (been here for 6 years now) you'd be amazed at the number of comedic situations you can find yourself in by using 'English' English. Next time you're over here mate, I recommend you try these babies out:
I'm just nipping outside to have a fag
Or if you find your trusty pencil case is lacking supplies:
Re: A Translation (Score:1)
I'm just nipping outside to have a fag
Or if you find your trusty pencil case is lacking supplies:
Can I borrow your rubber?
:)
Oh the laughs you'll get
Re: A Translation (Score:2)
There's great routine by comedian Mike Harding on these lines. To reiterate one of your examples, he talks about going into a shop and saying:
Can I have a big box of rubbers please? I keep making huge mistakes.
Another one he mentions is "laying the table".