This has been bothering me for months. Long after the event there is still a particular group of people who refuse to de-sticker their cars. They cling to hope, as if time stood still, waiting to find out if their man got the job. What am I talking about? Anyone who drives a long commute in the US knows what I'm talking about.
Folks, I have some disturbing news. It is 2005! Let me try again for the people in the back.
It is 2005!
Months ago most Kerry/Edwards stickers were removed from the windows and bumpers of commuting losers[*]. They got over it, moved on(.org), and did what normal people do. So the stickers came off.
But you, oh redneck Bush supporter[*] in your BMW Sedan, you can't let it go. You won. You gloat. You refuse to de-sticker your car because it now means something. It means, to you, that a man identified by a single letter way in the back of the alphabet was your man. You supported him and got away with it. So you keep your sticker, you clean it, you wear it proud. Right next to your "Gun Rights Improve Homeland Security" sticker.
This bothers me to no end. There is a deeper problem that I see, but it's not a problem at all. As I begin to explore this issue I realize that the real problem is that nobody sporting their "W" bumper sticker actually thinks about this like I do. That's because it requires words that are longer than two syllables matched with proper pronunciation.[*] Not that the Kerry supporters, had they won and kept their stickers, could do any better. In order to consider this issue out loud you have to be capable of speaking, and understanding, a complete thought.[*]
The real problem is that it seems like the Bush supporters only ever had one goal. To elect Bush. What next? They don't care! Their job is done. This strikes me as a problem since I have berated hard-line left-facing friends that their only goal is to elect Kerry. That may be my problem, but I know I'm not alone in that theory. Everyone knows that Kerry wasn't a very good candidate.[*] Everyone knows that Bush wasn't a very good candidate.[*] What I have never heard anyone say is that the Bush supporters were just voting the party line. You know it's true but nobody says that. Thankfully for me I didn't sticker my car.
So, to these lingering sticker-ers I ask, why haven't you moved on? Don't you want to add a sticker for the next important thing? Perhaps social security reform (or not), tax reform (or not). How about an "R '08" sticker since it would seem that you just live for elections and care little about the aftermath. "Republican for '08" is too long for those trendy stickers anyway.
Okay, I'm done.
[*] I'm making gross generalizations, antagonistic comments, and pandering gestures. It's supposed to be funny. Lighten up (please).