Which is to say, I generally don't think I overreact. (Although tonight I seem to be laborious and methodical in my verbiage, probably overly so.)
I'm really not trying to spew these sentences out, trust me. I think it's just the first time I've been awake this late in at least a couple of weeks, and it's had some sort of effect on me.
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I need to understand just how unimportant the average job application truly is. If I apply for a job, odds are I won't hear anything back, especially if it's being applied for via email.
I need to understand that.
Once I do, I won't attach such significance to each job offer I see somewhere. I won't wait eagerly for any replies, I'll merely note if they happen in and not mistake them for spam. I'll be more casual about the whole event.
My blood pressure's gone up twenty points or so, and I've gained probably around ten pounds over my standard weight since mid-highschool. My body's been going through serious stress reactions and I haven't been taking the appropriate countermeasures, and my body's been taking hard hits because of it. I Need To Calm Down A Whole Freakin' Bunch.
So I will. Starting now. I'm going to send the application, complete with what I hope is a good example of my work and --
Urgh. Now I have to convince myself that I have good examples of my work.
-- like I said, I'm going to send an application with a price and an example and I'm just going to pretend I never sent it at all after that. If something shows up, it's time to crack out the champagne, and if nothing shows up (according to plan) I won't even notice.