I want to be a journalist, so I can write headlines that will "keep it real" as the hyoomon kids today say.
For example, I would write: Southern anti-sex league sez: 'No sex for you!' I might even send a researcher into the news archives ("the morgue" in the newsie lingo!) to find us old quotes from the aforementioned anti-sex league about how they disfavor "race-mixing", etc. Always good for a laff.