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TorgoX (1933)


"Il est beau comme la retractilité des serres des oiseaux rapaces [...] et surtout, comme la rencontre fortuite sur une table de dissection d'une machine à coudre et d'un parapluie !" -- Lautréamont

Journal of TorgoX (1933)

Thursday March 31, 2005
12:46 AM

TV in the land of the corndog.

[ #23946 ]
Dear Log,

Torgo:   I'm watching the American adaptation of The Office.

Chuvmey:   How is it?

Torgo:   It's an odd mix of looking shinier, and looking so over-done that it's like something from Univisión.  Vérité camerawork meets Bumblebee Man.


Torgo:   And at a commercial break, a blurb for this.  I hope Bill Pullman gets well paid for this dreck.

Chuvmey:   I'm glad that this apocalyptic religious thriller has FRED DURST in it.

Torgo:   I didn't see that.  Because of HYSTERICAL BLINDNESS.

Chuvmey:   He's a nun.  She's a physicist.  THEY'RE COPS.

Torgo:   Starring Kathee Lee Crosby and Kathee Lee Gifford in a role that will surprise you!  This fall, on the Dumont Network!!!

Chuvmey:   stabbing self in face

Torgo:   "KATHEE, I THINK I'M PREGNANT!"  "NO, KATHEE, I THINK I'M PREGNANT!".  With Oprah as Missy Yee.

Chuvmey:   Left Behind: The Untold Buttocks

Torgo:   Oh man, this Office thing is creeping unhappily toward American Pie territory.

Chuvmey:   And this one time?  at band camp?

Torgo:   Hosing teethmarks off of the scenery.  I'm amazed they didn't bring back Michael Richards in a goatee or something.  I'm here to do diversity trailing WHOOPS A BANANA.

Chuvmey:   With special guest star Eugene Levy as Pazuzu, Lord of the Flies.

Torgo:   "Pazuuuuuzuuuuuuu you!"  "Whaaaaaa!"

Chuvmey:   Entertaining cameos by the Queer Eye guys and Anna Nicole.  Music by Yellowcard and Good Charlotte.

Torgo:   I want a show that consists entirely of spinfades.

Chuvmey:   Yesss.

Torgo:   I'm worried that there will be product placement at any moment.

Chuvmey:   Mysterious guest appearance by Dennis Miller who mentions Del Taco five times

Torgo:   I am going to show you a link about a show that I just saw a promo for, and it will make you stabby.  NOW!

Chuvmey:   NO.