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Ovid (2709)

Ovid
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Stuff with the Perl Foundation. A couple of patches in the Perl core. A few CPAN modules. That about sums it up.

Journal of Ovid (2709)

Sunday September 08, 2002
03:56 PM

Exquisite Hell

[ #7605 ]

If I heard a voice from Heaven say 'Live without loving',
I'd beg off. Girls are such exquisite hell. -- Ovid (the original)

I don't understand the weird stuff I always get into with women as it always seems to be feast or famine with me. It used to be that I couldn't pick up a woman if she had handles. However, I got engaged at one point and women started crawling out of the woodwork. One even showed up at my office wearing a waaaaay too tight t-shirt that read "Steelworkers do it hard" and she asked me point blank if I loved my fiancée and if I wanted to go out (I told her 'no'). Years later, after my divorce, the famine was back in full force.

I generally don't meet women too easily, but when I do, others still seem to pop up. With my last two girlfriends, I wound up getting surprise emails from old flames or phone calls out of the blue. Of course, I have to let them know that being friends is fine, but I'm spoken for -- yet I can't help but wonder how the heck women seemed to have developed this psychic ability to just know when a guy has a partner. Given a rather established, if somewhat bizarre, pattern in my life, I was rather nervous on Friday when I met a charming lady at a club and she and I agreed that we would meet the following night at another club. I liked her and I wanted to know her better but I knew trouble was there, hiding just out of my sight. That's just the way things work for me.

So last night I head to the club and she's not there. I'm sitting down chatting with friends, not really paying attention to anyone else, when this attractive blond catches my eye. I walk up and start chatting with her, get her phone number in just a couple of minutes (how the heck did I pull that off?!?!) and then she mentions that she doesn't know too many people there because she's still going to school and just started going out to clubs.

That's when the alarm bells started sounding and a voice in my head was screaming "Danger, Will Robinson, danger!", which I found pretty odd as my name is not Will Robinson.

I asked her age. She told me. I did the math. I graduated from high school before she even hit kindergarten. Uh oh.

Later, another woman walked up to me and asked me if I used to work for "Company X". I did and it turns out that she knew my name and we were sort of co-workers, even though we were in different departments. She also knows several of my friends, but somehow our paths never crossed until last night. She and I hit it off fairly well and then her friend chatting with me and was very friendly. What the heck? Her friend and I danced a little, my former co-worker didn't talk to me again, her friend wandered off, the attractive blond ignored me after that and the woman that I wanted to know better never showed up.

Now I'm sitting here now with a piece of paper with a phone number on it. It's probably worthless at this point. Truly girls are exquisite hell.

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