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Journal of IlyaM (2933)

Tuesday March 18, 2003
11:46 AM

My perfomance review

[ #11090 ]
Performance Appraisal for Mr. Martynov:

He frequently thinks "outside the box" and he handles assignments with unlooked-for creativity. The record should state that he shows potential for unbounded improvement and his full capabilities have only been recently discovered. Mr. Martynov makes decisions with minimal direction. He sets a compelling example for the younger employees. I find that Mr. Martynov has proven to be one of the company's larger investments. He appears ever productive and has been seen dropping in at off hours.

Generated with perfomance review generator :)

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  • Come now, surely no organization where the phrase "outside the box" is used would actually have its employees refer to each other by title and surname. Given name is so much more collegial, don't you think?
  • I love willing some companies are to label employees "investments" without actually investing anything in them.
  • Is that a left handed compliment? Struck me as an awkward turn of phrase.
    • > Is that a left handed compliment?

      probably... typical dilbert PHB-speak.

      Note also "appears productive" (versus "is"), "one of the company's largest investments" (without mentioning ROI), "potential for unbounded improvement" (sucks right now?), and just about every other phrase can be left-handed if properly squinted at ;)